As young girls, we grow up thinking beauty equals happiness. Through adolescence, there are women around us that unintentionally plant the seeds of thinking we are only deemed beautiful if we have perfectly shaped faces, features and bodies. The media blasts images of how we “should” look and all the ways to fix our flaws.
There is a fine line between self-care and obsessing over our appearance. Many things play into how we feel about ourselves. Maybe it was something you were teased about growing up, something your mom constantly mentioned or low self-esteem and constant comparison to others.
We are all made different and how wonderful it is to each have our own individual look.
If you take a look at the women around you and some of the most famous celebrities, you will realize they too, have asymmetrical faces, imperfections and things about them that make them unique. Many celebrities have made their mark in Hollywood with distinct characteristics that some would deem not attractive.
Think about the things that make you feel less attractive and ask yourself the following questions.
Does this affect my health?
If the things that bother you the most are also things that affect your well-being, consult a specialist and make a plan to get healthy. If you are fatigued, depressed, struggling with anxiety, weight or any other health issue, set a goal to make the necessary appointments to get the help you need. Seek professionals that will guide you through becoming a better you. It may not be easy, and it won’t happen overnight, but YOU CAN DO IT!
Does this make people not like me?
Chances are, the people you love the most love you just the way you are. If there is anyone in your life who constantly makes comments about your appearance, let them know that it makes you uncomfortable and makes you feel less.
Sometimes people point out other people’s flaws to make themselves feel better. Surround yourself with people who build you up, love you for you and support you through changes you feel necessary to make.
If the only reason you want to look a certain way is for “likes” on social media, consider taking a break from all things internet and go back to basics. Find things to do that bring out your talents and make you feel confident from a job well done. Really think about the things that make you wonderful just the way you are.
Does this make me feel insecure?
You desperately want to get braces and love your smile. Maybe you want to color your hair, get facials to improve the texture and appearance of your skin, wear makeup to enhance your features or buy clothes that complement your shape. You’ve lost all of your eyebrow hair from age, medications or chemo? Get them micro bladed and enjoy having brows again. Maybe you recently lost 100 pounds, and all of the loose skin needs to go. A tummy tuck or breast lift after losing weight, aging or having children can put things back to where they once were. There is nothing wrong with self-care and wanting to look and feel your best. The key is keeping these things in check so that you don’t end up looking like a totally different person.
One of the most fascinating things about beauty is how many different types of beauty there are. A woman can truly be gorgeous at all stages of life. Sometimes the raw, vulnerable moments are the loveliest. A world full of people that morph into one type of look would be far less interesting and just plain scary. Use the beauty within you to bring out your best, and you can learn to love the things that make you different.
Leslie Peck is a local makeup artist, aesthetician and lash artist with almost two decades of experience. She has worked 11 seasons of NYC Fashion Week as well as several beauty shoots while living in New York City. Leslie also has experience in TV, film, print and celebrity makeup in Los Angeles. She specializes in bridal makeup, skincare education and was featured on the front page of the Wall Street Journal in 2007.